Safe To Dance

Dear you,

The Taliban officially owns Afghanistan again; it is absolutely not safe to dance there.  What is this religious obsession with dance or pleasure in general?  Researching the history of dance as “sin”, I learned about Sayyid Qutb.  He came from Egypt in the 1950s to study America and left enraged, driven to “wage holy war” based on what he witnessed. This man is said to have created the theoretical basis for radical Islamism.  The following website describes a pivotal moment when he watched people dancing to “Baby It’s Cold Outside” at a sweet little Christmas party:

 https://qz.com/1491525/baby-its-cold-outside-and-the-rise-of-islamic-fundamentalism/

Oh for the love of god.  Literally.

I know I am being judgy again, but this is nonsense.  It’s malevolent nonsense.  When these religious guys (yes, they are usually guys) create their sin lists, innocent people get hurt.  Innocent people get fearful.  Innocent people who just want to be “good” feel lost and post questions like this to religious advice websites:

“Is it a sin to whistle, to clap, to wear yellow and red clothes?”

On another site, a soon to be married Christian man asked for permission to dance at his own wedding.  The advising expert (sexpert/pervert I would say) called him self-indulgent. He claimed dancing as found in Bible stories was different, not like “modern” forms “designed to express a love interest in the other person.  Movement, hand placement, and body positions all speak of intimacy in a public setting.  There are dances that don’t, but they are not currently favored.”  Oh, I got it now.  You can dance if you want to, but only if you do the “not currently favored” moves.  Just avoid moving in any way that is remotely appealing. Move without design and remember that this is a non-contact sport.  Do not touch.  Do not titillate. 

Which leaves me with a very short list of non-sinful dances, moves guaranteed to repel and not appeal:

The Funky Chicken

Jane Fonda Aerobic Grapevines (no hip movement, please)

The Robot

The YMCA (oh the irony, Village People and all that)

The Dad Dance (fist pump with foot stomp)

That Thing Where You Hold Your Foot Close to Your Ass and Hop Around

Nothing on that list is attractive.  Nureyev couldn’t make those moves sexy.  Maybe a stripper could, but I am pretty sure stripping is only allowed before baptism.  (Do they baptize naked?  I was raised chill-Methodist and we just got a little water sprinkled on our heads.  That’s probably why I was doomed to love dance and other assorted sins, faulty baptism.)

These sin-patrol monitors need to shut the hell up and quit projecting their shame on others.

I know, the Taliban and their kinder, gentler version here in the USA aren’t listening to sinners like us.  Since they aren’t, we need to add another line to the Declaration of Independence, update it for the record:

Dancing in all its forms is a human right; it shall be safe to dance.

(And to make music, to love who you will, to read, to write, to learn, to simply BE.)

Donate, please, to International Rescue Committee via RESCUE.org online.   They are working to evacuate, protect, and feed Afghani people. Thank you.

Love,

Joyce