Thursday, August 24, 2023

About Last Night . . .

 Dear you,

Yes, I watched the first Republican debate last night.  Yes, I was horrified but not surprised by my horror.  One big car crash, I could not look away.  Of course the majority of players on that stage will support a (probably) convicted criminal if they themselves don't secure the nomination. And of course the main points of debate were about how depraved liberal cities are, how America as a whole is in decline, and how teachers' unions are the cause of all ills.  I won't rehash what you saw and heard.  I will, however, attempt to confront horror with humor.  Take Vivek, the empty bloviator "businessman".  Watching him, all I could think about was this:

Do you remember that Friends episode when Ross got his teeth whitened at a mall?  That's all I could think about when the camera focused on Vivek. Of note, after the debate when Hannity interviewed this isolationist barbarian, he made a big deal out of those teeth, complimenting his smile. "Politicians should smile more." (WTF.)

And then there was the poor governor of North Dakota, all banged up after a game of basketball.  Did you catch his final remarks to the audience?  He looked like he was on the rack; perhaps his pain meds had worn off.  He babbled about his work ethic and said something about his hygiene routine. It made no sense to me.  What the hell was his point?  My friend James in NYC clarified it for me:  "he showers at night".  Side splitting. This makes him an ideal candidate for POTUS.

Finally, there was poor Mike Pence reminding us about his born again status.  We learned (again) that Jesus is his personal savior.  This, in his view, makes him a leader of moral authority.  What do we know about right and wrong?  What do we "unsaved" know about the best way to run a country?  Mike's theocracy is the way to go!  Question, Mr. Pence, you might be saved, but who will save us from you?

Enough about that.  Just stay tuned; the comedy will continue.

Love,

Joyce

 


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